Well, Miss, ‘ere we are, everything ship shape, like they say. Great thing to have, a lady, with clean ‘abits. Sets me a good example. A man alone, he gets to livin’ like a bloomin’ og. Then, too, with me, it’s always put things off. Never do todye wot ya can put orf til tomorrer. But you: business afore pleasure, every time. Do yer pers’nal laundry, make yerself spic an’ span, get all the mendin’ out o’ the way, an’ then, an ‘ hone-ly then, set down to a nice quiet hour with the Good-Book. I tell you, it’s a model for me, like. An inspiration. I ain’t got that ole engine so clean in years; inside an’ out, Miss. Just look at ‘er, Miss! She practically sparkles. Myself too. Guess you ain’t never ‘ad a look at me without whiskers an’ all cleaned up, ‘ave you, Miss? Freshens you up, too; if I only ‘ad clean clothes, like you. Now you: why you could be at ‘igh tea. ‘Ow ’bout some tea, Miss, come to think of it? Don’t you stir; I’ll get it ready. ‘Ow’s the book, Miss? Not that I ain’t read it, some — that is to say, me ole lyedy read me stories out of it. ‘Ow ’bout reading it out loud, eh, Miss? I’d like to ‘ave a little spiritual comfort m’self. An’ you call yerself a Christian! You ‘ear me, Miss. Don’t yer?! Don’t yer?! HUH??
The African Queen, Charlie Allnut